The vast majority of young males are very emotionally weak and fragile, why?

The Problem

As with all questions there are so many interrelated reasons, but we will focus down on a single area.

This current male condition has its roots in the women’s liberation movement a long time ago. Prior to that, society still produced men, but not anymore, very few men are developed now, and society is really paying the price.

The area to be aware of is the lack of male initiation rites of passage. Before the industrial revolution, boys spent most of the day with their fathers, and the other elders.  There they learned how to be men and to prove themselves in the company of men. 

A male initiation right is a test of hardship where the boy leaves the world of play and his Mom, and enters the world of men, responsibility, and his Dad. When he successfully completes this test, he is acknowledged by the elders and welcomed into the circle of men.

In this process and for all his life, he is toughened, hardened, and his masculinity is constantly polished and always needed.  Most importantly, his masculinity is admired by his peers and women.

Today, that has been carefully engineered out of society to such an extent that young males don’t even know what it means to be a man.  Many of them are ashamed of their masculinity.  It is viewed as something that needs apology.  They have no mentors or rights of initiation.  Few boys grow up knowing their fathers, and the wound between the two is large and deep.  They grow up never making a psychological / emotional break with their mom, and so as adults they gravitate to women who mother them rather than actually love them.

Key understanding – Women cannot produce men, only men can.  Period.

A Solution

First, invest a few dollars and get a copy of IRON JOHN by Robert Bly.  It’s the very best book on this subject I have ever seen. It altered the course of my development as a man when I was about 30 years old.

Next, if you’re a young male, (and that would include guys in their 30’s, even their 40’s), seek out a real male mentor, someone who inspires you, at least 10 years older, possessing real world wisdom and experience, and establish a relationship with him. 

Most older men are more than happy to help mentor a younger man who respects them.  It is natural for men to want to pass on their wisdom and experience.

If you’re lucky you may find a tribe of men that have real substance. The key factor is the leadership, who is it, and how do you feel with him?

Beware of gurus who want you to follow them, that is different, it is an ego trip that can cause you a lot of harm downline.  A real mentor will help you, but he will have no desire for you to worship him on any kind of pedestal.

Remember this,

Iron sharpens Iron, Man sharpens man. 

You will NEVER become a man through women.  That is a fact.

As a Spiritual Life Engineer, I accept clients for mentorship, feel free to contact me to discuss that.

Dr. G. Rex Kruhly

Spiritual Life Engineer